Ft. Lauderdale, Florida
Human technology sensors have evolved a tremendous amount in the past year, let alone the past decade. Human driving cars are now capable of doing much more than their humble beginnings in the horse and buggy era.
Benjamin Ferrara, 26, pictured above with our reporter’s car, is the owner of a 2004 Toyota Corolla and was able to demonstrate the lofty capabilities of human insight.
Benji, as he demanded we call him since that’s what his friends do, was hot on the scene a near 25 minutes after the accident. “Yeah, so I just saw a bunch of cars backed up and it was like really bad bro. I’m sitting there thinking, ‘Damnit man, if I’m late to work again I’m for sure getting canned.’ Because Tim was on today, and he’s more of a dick that my boy Roger who’s also a manager but he’s tight with my girlfriend’s brother,” Benji explained the circumstances to while our reporter hurriedly jotted down the most important details.
“Anyway, it’s like stand-still. I’m trying to think of what happened. At first, I was like, I hope they didn’t start putting stop lights on the highway, bro, that would absolutely not be the move.” For the sake of clarity, the Venture Crunch has not heard of any plans for stop lights being put on the highway. We will keep you updated as soon as we hear anything backing up these claims.
“So after about like ten minutes we start crawling. Like crawling, bro, like my foot wasn’t even on the gas. I roll up by this Ford Mustang that was hella crumpled up in the front with smoke coming out of the engine. There was this bald dude in a dress shirt standing by the car looking mad pissed, bro,” Benjie said as he started waving his hands.
“The other car was a Honda Pilot. I remember it was a Honda Pilot because I said to myself, ‘glad they’re not my pilot!’ and I started bawling laughing to myself, bro,’ Benji said as he put his hand on our reporter’s shoulder. “I even texted my girlfriend that joke, here check it out.” Benji unveiled a cracked iPhone 5 with a text to a Sabrina Mendez ????.
“I was like, that is for sure an accident like without a doubt. The thought came into my brain and I just knew it was right.”