Business Major to go on Shark Tank to Explain Hireable Assets

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Putting the finishing touches on his tie, 21-year-old Chris Bonilla confirmed he will be appearing on ABC’s Shark Tank Thursday night. Bonilla, a senior at Florida State University, has a major in Marketing and a Minor in Entrepreneurship.

”There’s a lot of pressure on me, but I’m not worried.” said Bonilla, adding that hiring him is the obvious decision for any company that wants to be successful. “Look, I was social chair in my fraternity, got an A in Principles of Marketing AND Introduction to Financial Accounting, had a girlfriend for three months, and got a 3.6 GPA last semester. I’m just an all around facey guy. I can talk to pretty much anyone.” When asked what his career aspirations are, Bonilla replied “I’ll probably go work at Google or Facebook. But at like a management level role you know? I’m not doing any bitch work. I already did my internships Sophomore Year,” Bonilla began to start his tie knot over, “Or maybe SnapChat, I heard those guys are pretty chill.”

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